Does a person who believes in letting go have dreams? Should they? Do dreams qualify as desires? To a person with OCD a dream might easily become an obsession and I find this more often than not is my case.
Over the last few days I have relaxed my focus on letting go and sure enough I got pulled in by a challenge on a fitness site I frequent. A day or two later I wondered why my stress level and anxiety had increased. I find this quite interesting. Of course, one must do some planning ahead for things. You can't just run off on a world trip without some arrangements. A simple 2 hour activity should not be so consuming though. It should not leave one with a lower mental stability than what was there before. It should help in the long run before and after and not hinder. This is where the dream/desire becomes a negative sum for me.
What do I do? The challenge itself is a good thing, it's completely doable easily with little planning in actuality, and it turns out even when I complete it I can't afford the pricey swag I am then allowed to buy to show for it.. It boils down to how I see it. Some challenges truly are beyond my scope and would derail me if I tried to get back in the running on them, but this one is pretty simple. I must see it for what it is. A simple adventure and not an opportunity to wallow in my self grandiosity, dreaming of the ultimate ride to make all others envious, and in all likelyhood overextend myself and create feelings of inadequacy comparing myself to others and my inability to train properly due to life as I know it.
Adventure, yeah I called it an adventure. I thrive on exploration and adventure. I think the problem is when the adventure takes on expedition proportions. When my desires start to steer my life away from the things I need to do to maintain emotional stability. This is the challenge. When time starts slipping and old habits return and meditation gets pushed back until it has to be abandoned for sleep. Life needs spaces of simplicity, meditation is one of those things, just sit , feel, and observe.
It is often surprising how often we know what works for us and we choose something else in the moment. Moments become days, and days become months, time slips by. In the end it will pass and we will move on to other states, sentient or not. Choosing the best for each moment we are given is almost impossible if we don't pay attention to it. So, I have prepared for something pretty near to the original, but toned down a bit, however, I will not have any issue changing plans if it doesn't work out. This is not a world premier but merely a passing street musician, isn't it the constant flow of simple things that continually sustain us in the end day in and day out? The big things are so quickly dropped into the past and we are left again as before.
Over the last few days I have relaxed my focus on letting go and sure enough I got pulled in by a challenge on a fitness site I frequent. A day or two later I wondered why my stress level and anxiety had increased. I find this quite interesting. Of course, one must do some planning ahead for things. You can't just run off on a world trip without some arrangements. A simple 2 hour activity should not be so consuming though. It should not leave one with a lower mental stability than what was there before. It should help in the long run before and after and not hinder. This is where the dream/desire becomes a negative sum for me.
What do I do? The challenge itself is a good thing, it's completely doable easily with little planning in actuality, and it turns out even when I complete it I can't afford the pricey swag I am then allowed to buy to show for it.. It boils down to how I see it. Some challenges truly are beyond my scope and would derail me if I tried to get back in the running on them, but this one is pretty simple. I must see it for what it is. A simple adventure and not an opportunity to wallow in my self grandiosity, dreaming of the ultimate ride to make all others envious, and in all likelyhood overextend myself and create feelings of inadequacy comparing myself to others and my inability to train properly due to life as I know it.
Adventure, yeah I called it an adventure. I thrive on exploration and adventure. I think the problem is when the adventure takes on expedition proportions. When my desires start to steer my life away from the things I need to do to maintain emotional stability. This is the challenge. When time starts slipping and old habits return and meditation gets pushed back until it has to be abandoned for sleep. Life needs spaces of simplicity, meditation is one of those things, just sit , feel, and observe.
It is often surprising how often we know what works for us and we choose something else in the moment. Moments become days, and days become months, time slips by. In the end it will pass and we will move on to other states, sentient or not. Choosing the best for each moment we are given is almost impossible if we don't pay attention to it. So, I have prepared for something pretty near to the original, but toned down a bit, however, I will not have any issue changing plans if it doesn't work out. This is not a world premier but merely a passing street musician, isn't it the constant flow of simple things that continually sustain us in the end day in and day out? The big things are so quickly dropped into the past and we are left again as before.
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